"This is Lowell Thomas, reporting from the IJN Admiralty Bathroom. Yamamoto is heaving into sight now, through clouds of steam rising from the ornate bronze tub, which I am told displaces three tons. Let me clarify, that is the bathtub's displacement, not the Admiral's. He is turning now, and I believe he is waving at the crowd -- yes, that's definitely a wave from Yamamoto. It is surely a sign of the man's great reserve that the presence of more than thirty high-ranking officers, and a dozen international correspondents, at the bath that launches this truly impressive bathchamber, should so little perturb him. "Escort vessels are now being launched: I can see a magnificent floating candleholder -- no, a flotilla of three -- making colored smoke, and now a large yellow duck. We'll try to get close and see if it squeaks, so listen closely, ladies and gentlemen. Did you hear that? What a spectacle! "Uhm, a young lady wearing, well, I cannot tell you for fear of angering General Sarnoff, but she is asking us to move away from the railing in very definite terms. I believe this will conclude our broadcast today. Yamamoto passes in review: a memorable sight."
John M. Ford Div. of Inappropriate Technology Evil Geniuses for a Better Tomorrow Creators of ED MURROW GETS BLITZED: "This . . . is London. I think. I can't see over the table."
Second Archive
Date: 2006-09-26 12:17 pm (UTC)Yamamoto is heaving into sight now, through clouds of steam rising
from the ornate bronze tub, which I am told displaces three tons. Let
me clarify, that is the bathtub's displacement, not the Admiral's. He
is turning now, and I believe he is waving at the crowd -- yes, that's
definitely a wave from Yamamoto. It is surely a sign of the man's
great reserve that the presence of more than thirty high-ranking
officers, and a dozen international correspondents, at the bath that
launches this truly impressive bathchamber, should so little perturb
him.
"Escort vessels are now being launched: I can see a magnificent
floating candleholder -- no, a flotilla of three -- making colored
smoke, and now a large yellow duck. We'll try to get close and see if
it squeaks, so listen closely, ladies and gentlemen. Did you hear
that? What a spectacle!
"Uhm, a young lady wearing, well, I cannot tell you for fear of
angering General Sarnoff, but she is asking us to move away from the
railing in very definite terms. I believe this will conclude our
broadcast today. Yamamoto passes in review: a memorable sight."
John M. Ford
Div. of Inappropriate Technology
Evil Geniuses for a Better Tomorrow
Creators of ED MURROW GETS BLITZED:
"This . . . is London. I think. I can't see over the table."